Matching Jammies

Aunt Heather made some matching PJ's for her boys and Jessalyn. And Uncle James wanted some pants too. So now they area all matching in their cozy monster jammies.
Here's silly cousin Roman. He wanted my camera so he could take pictures himself.

Jessalyn's jammies were so cute and tiny compared to everyone elses. And Heather put some flowers on them for a girly touch.
They are so warm and cozy. She loved them so much she passed on daddy's lap.

Thank you Aunt Heather!

10 Weeks Old

Jessalyn is going to be 10 weeks tomorrow. I can't believe it. Jordan and I told her to slow down and stop growing for a little while. We wish she could stay a baby for two years and then start getting bigger. Haha. She is so alert and loves to watch us. She started smiling a lot more this week. She wakes up with a huge smile on her face and sometimes when you talk she thinks it's pretty funny and smiles. It looks like she is trying very hard to laugh. I'm sure little baby giggles are coming up soon.
Another thing she has been doing a lot this week is sucking on her hands. I try to give her a binky but she prefers her hands more. They must taste pretty yummy. I tried to see if she could suck her thumb but not quite. With all this hand sucking maybe she might turn into a thumb sucker.

And as you can see as a lady said out at a restaurant the other day, "She doesn't miss a meal!" lol. Look at those cute arm rolls, and chubby cheeks and double chin. I love chubby babies! I was a pretty chunky baby so she's following in mommy's footsteps.

She is doing great sleeping at night. She doesn't completely sleep through the night yet but she does normally sleep about ten or more hours which is great for me! She wakes up to eat about two or three times at night. She doesn't completely wake up. She starts squirming and makes little noises and that's how I know she is hungry so she eats a little then falls right back to sleep. We have a routine that we started at about four weeks. She gets a bath every night at around 8 or 9 then she gets her sleepy time lotion and into her jammies. We get into bed with her blankey she usually nurses until she falls asleep. We haven't skipped a day since we started and it's working great for us. I think it's her favorite part of the day. She is so much fun. I love just hanging out and having little baby conversations with her.

Oh the drama!

I've been debating whether or not I wanted to blog about this but I decided that it's part my whole journey into motherhood. Now that I am feeling so much better I thought I would finally make a post about it. Just a warning- it is a little TMI.

At about three weeks post partum I was sitting and nursing Jessalyn when I felt something leaking down my leg. I thought I peed my pants or something so I got up quickly, put Jessalyn in her bouncer and ran to the bathroom. I didn't pee myself thank goodness but blood was dripping down my leg like crazy. I know you are supposed to bleed after you have a baby but with the amount of blood that was still coming out it was not normal. I yelled for Jordan and told him what was going on. He immediately called my Dr. but I knew it was bad so I told him we might as well go to the hospital.

We got to the ER and got an ultrasound and they checked me to see what was going on. They noticed in the ultrasound that there was possibly still a little bit of placenta that was leftover. I was instructed to make an appointment with my midwife in the morning to see what she says to do.

That following day I went in to my midwife and she prescribed me some medicine to take for a few days that was supposed to help flush everything out. She wanted to avoid any kind of surgery and said this was probably going to work.

Fast forward to about a week later, I woke up to go to the bathroom and noticed I was laying in a puddle of something. I ran to the bathroom really fast and was leaking blood everywhere. There was a huge trail of blood from the bed to the bathroom and all over the bathroom floor. I yelled for Jordan and he woke up fast and in a panic. We were both shocked that this was happening again and it seemed a bit worse than last time. Jordan said the bathroom looked like a crime scene. I started getting really nervous so I rushed him out of the house with a towel wrapped around me and rushed to the hospital. We ran red lights and everything. It was about 1 am so luckily there wasn't any traffic. I rushed into the ER and was immediately seen because of how bad I was bleeding. I got yet another ultrasound and was checked again. They decided that I should stay in the hospital over night so that I could get a D&C in the morning. Jordan and Jessalyn stayed over night with me until he had to go to his paper route in the morning. That morning the Dr. came in and informed me that he looked at my ultrasound and didn't think it was big enough or worth having the surgery to take it out. He said that was probably the end of it and it could have been the pills I was given that was making me bleed again. I went to a follow up about a week later and the same Dr. told me that he read it wrong but nothing was in there anymore. I was really relieved everything was better and I wouldn't have to worry about it anymore.

I was so wrong. About another week later I was sitting on the couch with Jessalyn and Jordan enjoying a nice Saturday morning. I got up to go to the bathroom and I instantly felt blood gushing and running down my leg. I hurried to the bathroom and hoped it would stop. But it literally kept pouring out. I changed my blood soaked pants and hoped maybe the blood would slow down...but it soaked through what I was wearing again. I went in and told Jordan we needed to make yet another trip to the ER. So frustrated we both started packing Jessalyn up to go again. But this time it was worse. The blood wouldn't stop and I started feeling really light headed. Jordan told me to hurry and go down to the car but I knew I wouldn't make it so I laid down in middle of our dining room hoping I wouldn't pass out. I started freaking out so Jordan decided to call 911. Luckily the ambulance came fast. They took my blood pressure and it was pretty low when I sat up. So they strapped me in and rolled me outside which was pretty embarrassing. Some of our neighbors were out and were watching them take me into the ambulance for the second time since we have lived there. They were probably wondering what's wrong with this poor girl. lol.

When I arrived at the ER the Dr. decided that getting the D&C was going to be the best option at this point. What's so frustrating about it is I should have had the surgery the first time around instead of going through all of this three times. I was prepped for surgery and rolled up to the OR. I have never had any type of surgery before so this was very scary for me no matter how small or fast the procedure was. At the same time I was happy to finally get it over and done with. All I really remember after being rolled into the OR was having the oxygen over my face and trying to breath as I passed out quickly from the anesthesia. The next thing I knew I was laying in the recovery room in a haze and the only thing I could say was "My feet are cold." haha. It took me forever to wake up. I heard everything going on around me but couldn't seem to wake up. When I finally woke up I felt so drunk and delirious. I was luckily allowed to go home right after. Everything was pretty much a blur from that point until the next morning.

I'm so happy the surgery finally took care of the problem. For the week after I was living in fear that I would wake up in a pool of blood again. But time has passed and everything is so much better. We were really being tested with all of this. But now we are back on our feet and I've been getting out of the house and enjoying things again. We are having tons of fun with our smiley baby and so happy all of that is behind us now.

Congrats James!

Jordan's brother James just graduated from Cleveland Chiropractic College. We couldn't be more excited for him and his family. It was a long road for them but they finally made it.

Being at his graduation made us so excited for us to be in the same position in about 5 years from now. Looking at them really gave us hope that it is going to happen and will be worth it :)

Mom and dad are very proud!

Jessalyn was good through the whole graduation but fell asleep at the end. But she still had to get a picture with her uncle James! Haha.

I stole these pictures from Heather.

We are so happy for this beautiful family. They deserve all the best that is in store for them.

Congrats again Dr. James Sheffer III!

6 Weeks Old!

Jessalyn turned 6 weeks yesterday and she has already changed so much. I feel like I woke up one day and she looked different. She has definitely gotten a little chunkier. She loves to eat! I love chunky babies. The rolls look so cute on them. She just started smiling too. It was the cutest thing the first time I saw it. I was talking to her and she must have thought what I was saying was funny because she smiled really big almost like she was going to laugh. Then she gave daddy a smile when he came home. She also things her Uncle James is pretty hilarious because she gave him a bunch of smiles too.
Penny loves Jessalyn so much. She is always trying to lick her face but we stop her before she does it. I joke around and say that Penny thinks she is so little and cute and looks like a mini version of her dad so that's why she loves her so much.

One Month Old!

Today Jessalyn is one month old! We fall in love with her more everyday. We love staring at her while she sleeps and watching her silly faces when she is awake. She makes the cutest little squeaky noises all the time. She is a very happy baby and pretty much only cries when she is hungry. She is so alert and has been pretty much from week one. When you hold her she looks around all over the place and loves staring up at lights. She is very curious. I'm not sure if that is going to be a good or bad thing when she gets older. Haha. She absolutely loves to be held. Which isn't the best thing when I need to get things done. She also sleeps best when she is in my arms or laying right next to me. So she isn't a huge fan of sleeping by herself. I plan on trying to change that. But I love snuggling with her so it's okay with me for now. She is already a daddy's girl. She loves hanging out with daddy and sleeping on him and she loves listening to him talk and play the piano. Sometimes she can be very dramatic and will randomly let out one really loud cry then be perfectly fine after. I think she is just trying to get our attention. She is just like her father in so many ways. The way she looks and a lot of the things she does. She frowns just like him and makes some of the same facial expressions. Pretty much all she got from me that I can see so far is her eyebrows and her fingers. Haha. I love watching her stretch when she is waking up and sometimes when she sleeps she moves her mouth like she is sucking on something but she has nothing in her mouth. She loves bath time and it always calms her down if she's not so happy. She just sits there with a happy look on her face and just sits there the whole time enjoying it. But pretty much as soon as I take her out and wrap her in the towel she starts crying. I think she would stay in there for hours if she could. She is sleeping a lot better at night. She goes to bed at around 10 or 11 and wakes up about three times during the night to eat and usually wakes up around 8 or 9 in the morning. There are so many other things she does that we love and it's so fun watching her change and grow already.

We have been so blessed with this amazing little girl. Motherhood has been different than I thought it was going to be. Not in a bad way. I haven't had the typical post partum experience.

Pretty much from the first day home I was so nervous. It's only natural to be nervous bringing this little human home that you are responsible for taking care of. She was up pretty much the whole first night. I was so extremely exhausted and even woke my mom up to take her for a little while so I could sleep. The next day my nervous feeling felt worse. Every time she would cry my heart would start racing and my hands would get really sweaty. I would sit there holding her in a daze. She was the most amazing thing in the world but I couldn't help feeling sad and scared. That night I went to bed and started crying. Jordan asked what was wrong with me and I said I was so scared. I was scared that I was doing things wrong. I was scared that I didn't know what I was doing. I was just scared. He reassured me that I'm doing a great job and she is happy and healthy. I couldn't stop crying. I asked my mom the next day if it was normal to feel this nervous all the time. My heart was constantly racing and I was sweating from being so nervous. She said it was normal to be a little nervous but not constantly so she suggested I call my midwife. I called and instantly started crying. She asked me a few questions about how I was feeling and told me it sounded like I had post partum depression so I made an appointment to go in and see her. When I went in to see her I looked and felt miserable. I had no energy or desire to even try to do my hair or makeup. She gave me a questionnaire and asked me some questions and diagnosed me with post partum depression. She prescribed an anti depressant and tried to comfort me because I couldn't stop crying. She explained that what I'm feeling is because of my hormones and has nothing to do with me. She told me not to worry and I will start feeling better and that I'm a great mom.

I started taking the anti depressant that evening and tried to get some rest since that's what my midwife said would help. I woke up from my nap and I was feeling really bad anxiety. My heart was racing worse than before and I was sweating and I started feeling dizzy like the room was spinning. I told my mom and Jordan how I was feeling and I started crying and told them I felt like I was going to die. I was feeling so bad that I told them I wanted to go to the hospital. I kept saying I felt like I was going to die so they decided to call 911. The ambulance got their really fast and they tried to calm me down. I was having a severe panic attack so they decided to take me to the hospital. I actually rode in the ambulance and they strapped me in. It was all pretty much a blur because I was so dizzy and delirious. There wasn't much they could do for a panic attack except give me something for anxiety. But I didn't want to take it because it was bad for the baby since I'm breastfeeding. I calmed down after being in the ER for a while and they sent me home with the prescription for the anti- anxiety medicine just in case I had another panic attack.

For about the next few days to a week I was still feeling horrible anxiety. I didn't want to go anywhere or do anything. I would just sit and stare and I don't know how many times I told Jordan that I hated feeling this way. He was great the whole time and tried to comfort me and tell me that I will get through it. I pretty much completely lost my appetite and would force myself to eat. I would have been lost with out my mom. She made food for me and cleaned and did laundry and would watch Jessalyn while I slept. I got a lot of support from family so that helped a lot as well.

Luckily now I'm feeling ten times better but not 100 percent yet. My midwife said it would take a few weeks to feel "normal" again. I'm not feeling horrible anxiety anymore. I never want to feel the way I was feeling again. Some days are better than others. I'm actually smiling and laughing and doing my hair and makeup now. Haha. Through all of this, looking at my precious baby girl has helped me get through it. She makes everything worth it. Everything has gotten a lot easier now that we are getting in a routine and adjusting to things. Now I can't imagine life with out her and love waking up to that precious little face every morning.

The Birth Story

*Warning* This is very long! I mostly put every little detail down for me so when I look back at it I can remember my birth experience.

I was dreading going past my due date and was so sure it was going to happen. I started doing almost everything I could to try to naturally induce myself a week before my due date. The only thing I wouldn't try is castor oil. Yuck! I really wanted to experience what it was like to go into labor by myself. I packed my hospital bags and wanted the excitement of rushing out of the house with my hospital bags all ready to go.

I wasn't feeling any contractions the week before. Maybe just a few braxton hicks contractions but that was about it. My brother in law James was doing some accupressure on me to help speed things up. I was also drinking red raspberry leaf tea and taking evening primrose oil which was suggested by my midwife. My last appointment was on Friday, October 8th. I was hoping there would be a little more progress from my last appointment. When she checked me I was only 1.5 cm. dilated and about 50% effaced. That was only half a cm. difference from the week before. She mentioned stripping my membranes which could possibly cause me to into labor within the next 48 hours. But she wasn't going to be on call over the weekend so she said she would do it on Monday the 11th. I was a little disappointed when we left the dr. I kind of had a feeling not a whole lot of progress was going on so I half expected it. We talking about inducing me and she said she would want to do it a week later. I was even more disappointed about that. I was starting to feel like I was going to be pregnant forever. The one thing Jordan was most worried about was me going into labor right in the middle of his paper route at 2 in the morning.

Since nothing exciting was going on, James and Heather invited us to the pumpkin patch and said maybe a hayride would do me some good. We had some fun looking for pumpkins and drinking delicious apple cider and having a little picnic. My mom made me go for one more hayride. When I sat down a little boy tells his mom ,"She has a baby in her belly." Haha. It was pretty cute.

At about 1:30 am on the 9th I was woken up by a pretty strong pain. I really didn't think anything of it since I expected to feel a little cramping after an exam at the dr. the day before. I decided I would try to go back to sleep. Jordan left for his paper route at about 2 am and I was woken up again by this pain. It almost felt like a strong period cramp. I brushed it off and tried to go back to sleep again. But I couldn't. I started to wonder if these were contractions but wasn't sure since I have never felt any before. I decided to start timing them. They were about 10 minutes apart but I didn't want to start freaking out yet. I was going to wait it out to see if they got closer together or stronger. The last thing I wanted was to go to the hospital but be sent home for false labor. I decided I would take a shower and see if they felt the same after. I also decided to do a load of laundry because in my neat freak mind I thought to myself I don't want to come home after having a baby to laundry that isn't done. lol. After my shower the contractions still continued. I decided I would still wait it out because I wanted to wait for Jordan to get home from his paper route. 6:30 am rolled around and my contractions were getting a little stronger and about 5-10 minutes apart. I figured I would make sure I had everything in my hospital bags and they were ready to go. I finally decided to wake my mom up and tell her that I was having contractions. The funny thing is she was already up because she couldn't sleep. I think oddly enough she sensed something. I told her I think it was time so she said should probably take a shower. I sent a text to Jordan letting him know that I've been having contractions 5-10 minutes apart for the past 6 hours. He called me right away and told me I should call the midwife on call and see what she says to do. So I called her and she asked me a bunch of questions about my contractions and pain and if I'm getting an epidural. She told me it sounded like I was in labor and I should go to labor and delivery. I called Jordan back and told him it was time to go in.

We got to the hospital around 8:30 am. They were already expecting us and sent us straight over to the triage. The nurse strapped me in to monitor my contractions and checked to see how much I was dilated. I was at about 2 cm at this point. The nurse wanted me to walk around for 45 minutes to help me dilate more and get me contracting more.

So we walked, and walked and walked.

We went back to the triage and she checked me again. I got to about 3 cm but my contractions were slowing down a little so she wanted us to walk again. So we walked some more. My contractions were starting to get stronger and Jordan was getting a good work out walking the halls of labor and delivery. lol. After we walked I started progressing more so the nurse talked to the midwife and decided to move me to the labor and delivery room.

They hooked me up to all these machines and poked me with a bunch of needles. I got really nervous when we got into this room because this made it very real. My mom actually started getting very emotional when we got in there.

At about 12 PM I was at 5 cm and one of the midwives came in and broke my water. They told me that my contractions would start coming stronger and said I could get the epidural whenever I wanted. My contractions were already pretty bad but not completely unbearable. I didn't want them to get worse so I asked for it right at that moment. I got the epidural at about 12:30 and it was definitely very painful but it started working right away.

Since I couldn't feel the contractions anymore and I could relax I decided I would try to take a nap. My progress started to slow down a little once I got the epidural so they hooked me up to some pitocin at about 2 pm to speed things up. At around 4 pm I started feeling a lot of pressure so I let the nurse know. They checked me and I was fully dilated. They wanted to wait just a little bit before I started pushing.

Here we are right before I started to push. We were getting very excited because we knew we were that much closer to meeting our baby girl. Everything had been so easy up to this point so I figured this wasn't going to be any different. I actually didn't mentally prepare myself for how difficult pushing was going to be. I should have considering I was pushing out something the size of a bowling ball. lol. I figured I would give a few pushes and she would be out. Boy was I wrong. After a few pushes I was already exhausted. I was already tired from not having any sleep the night before and I had no strength or energy from not eating or drinking anything since the evening before. It turns out Jessalyn was facing up which was making it difficult for her head to get through. I was pushing with all that I had but she wasn't budging. After about an hour of pushing they decided I should take a break and lay in a position that would hopefully help her move to a better position. I rested for about 30 minutes and I felt like I could barely keep my eyes open. I was so exhausted. I started feeling my contractions again and they were feeling pretty painful that it was getting hard for me to breath through them. I remember laying in pain and crying telling Jordan "I can't do this anymore. This hurts!" I kept saying it over and over and he was trying to comfort me telling me we were so close and I could do it.

We let the nurses know that my epidural was starting to wear off so they gave me a button to push to give me another dose. It wasn't working for me so I was starting to feel everything. I started to push again but we weren't getting any closer than we were before. By this point my midwife told me that I could push for another hour but if nothing is happening then I would have to have a c-section. That was my worst fear so I started pushing as hard as I could. We were all getting worried that all this work was going to turn into a c-section. My midwife wasn't giving us a whole lot of hope. She was straight forward and was telling us that it didn't look like there was any progress. About another hour into pushing and two hours total Jessalyn decided to miraculousy turn her head in the right position. My midwife and the nurses moved quickly getting everything ready. I pushed about 4 more times and then next thing I knew I had my crying baby girl laying on top of me. I didn't care that she was covered in blood and mucous. I reached over and held on to her and was in shock that she was mine and she was inside me just seconds before. Jordan quickly cut the umbilical cord and they wisked her away to check on her. They were worried that she possibly got some meconium in her lungs because she was covered in it. Luckily she was fine and they didn't have to take her to the NICU.

I didn't actually get a chance to look at her so I asked Jordan what she looked like as they were cleaning her off and getting her weight and measurements. Jordan said she has his chin.

Here is Jordan's first moments with his daughter. He was in awe. This moment was so precious.

And here is my first time getting to look at my daughter's face and I fell instantly in love. She is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen in my life.

My mom was there through it all and she is a very proud grandma to her first grand daughter.

After my epidural wore off completely, the nurses wanted me to get up and go to the bathroom. At first it was hard for me to stand up but I did it with Jordan and the nurses help holding me up. The nurse asked me if I felt dizzy at all and I said I felt fine. I took my first step and my legs almost gave out on me. I slowly made my way to the bathroom. The nurse started explaining things to me and as she was explained I started sweating like crazy and I told the nurse that I was feeling dizzy. She rushed over to me to make sure I didn't fall off the toilet. I started feeling nauseous and like I was going to pass out. She made me put my head between my legs and put something under my nose and made me take a deep breath. I asked her if this was normal to feel like that and kept saying I didn't feel good. Jordan came over and they helped me get on the wheelchair. I was so delirious and out of it I felt like I was going to pass out at any moment. Luckily I didn't. I guess I lost a lot of blood so that was the reason I was feeling that way. I started feeling better after they got me to the other room and in the bed. That was a very scary experience and probably one of the worse out of the whole delivery.

Looking at our beautiful daughter made all of that worth going through. It was definitely the most difficult thing I have ever gone through but I would do it over again just for her.

And of course if you know me at all then you know I had to have my makeup and hair done in the hospital. lol. It made me feel ten times better.

We were so happy and scared to go home.

Our little family. Home sweet home!

Baby J has arrived!

Jessalyn Avery Sheffer arrived on October 9, 2010 at 6:38 P.M.

She weighed 7 lbs. 5 oz. 19 in.

She is beautiful and perfect in every way!

Birth story to come soon.

Hello October!

Yes, Baby J is who I'm evicting. I really hope she gets the notice! I have anticipated this week for months and months. I never knew exactly how I was going to feel. I knew I would be excited and anxious but I never thought it would be like this. I still have six days until my due date but I'm hoping maybe something will happen this week. Here's to wishful thinking. I've been told not to get attached to your due date so even though I hope that she comes sooner I have a feeling she is going to be here later. She must be nice and snug and comfy in my belly still but I am feeling the complete opposite. I feel like an 80 year old woman. I can barely stand with out preparing myself first and it takes me a minute. I walk like I should be using a cane and turning over in bed is a huge workout. I never thought that every little ache or pain I would stop and wonder if it was a contraction. Or if I was feeling a little something I hope that the pain gets worse. lol.

I had my 38 week dr. appointment on Friday. The latest news is that I am 1cm dilated which is exciting because at least I know there is some progress. On the other hand being dilated is no indication as to how soon I will go into labor. It could be now or weeks from now. My midwife felt around and estimated Baby J weighing about 7 pounds. She said she is "decent" sized. lol. We'll see if she is right. But by the time she gets here she might be 8 pounds or more. That scares me! I'm hoping she is a little less than that.

My mom is going to be here tomorrow and I'm so excited. I'm probably even going to feel even more anxious. I'm going to tell Baby J, "Okay grandma is here so you can come out and meet her." lol. Maybe she needs a little motivation.

Well, here's to hoping that Baby J will be here very soon...but I'm really not counting on it! Haha.

Maternity Pictures

Here are just a few of the amazing pictures my talented sister in law Heather took for our little family! The pictures where I'm wearing pink I'm 37 weeks and the purple ones I'm 38 weeks. Enjoy!

Penny is our first little furbaby so of course she had to be part of our family pictures!